Intervention Result- A Call to All Mommies!

Everyone has been asking about our recent non-divine intervention for our son, Absalom. The outpouring of support from friends and family has been soulwarming in this storm. The local police authorities were especially forthright in showing their concern. Rather than speak to everyone individually, and risk catching a nasty demon from the phone, I've decided to summarize the holy events which transpired.


First, nearly all five people I invited showed up. Absalom came in wearing a tight "hello kitty" t-shirt that belongs to his sister. And hot pants. We spent two hours trying to get Absalom to spit up his demon, until he finally untied himself and I realized that we needed the Lord to come up with a different plan.

I began to consider the events which could have caused Absalom's weird descent. There was that one day he skipped daily sunday school- and he never made up the twelve hours he missed. At first, I was certain that this was the culprit, as he must have spent that day getting infested with demon eggs. But then, I realized that the Lord had exacted his sevritude on Absalom through the whip, and that all was righteous in Absalom's heart.

Having determined that Absalom's wicked behavior was not his own fault, I began to ponder what else could be possessing him. I soon realized that the clothing he wore, the very beacon for my concern, was causing the problem. No wonder Tamar turned out so luke-warm- she had been wrapped in possessed clothing her entire life!

I ordered Absalom to strip down. Then, I took all of Tamar’s clothes and burned them in the backyard. Tamar cried and cried, which soothed my soul, as it meant the devils were getting released from her. Now, I have two naked teenage children locked in my garage, and I’m nearly out of mini-Ritz! Oh, the trials of a modern mommy.

I’m sure you’ve had your own experiences as a Christian mother with 4-10 children. Feel free to share them in our comments section.